I know “Fuck You” is supposed to be the song of the summer, but this beat is outstanding, Kanye sounds great, and Rick Ross is held to only about 12 seconds — exactly how long he’s capable of being entertaining. Top with Justin “Bon Iver” Vernon, and I’ve listened to this song like half a dozen times this morning.
But someone should really put out a version with Jay-Z’s verse removed. Then it would be a reasonable four-minute song, and you would only lose Jay reading lines he obviously wrote in his sleep. “Everybody wants to know my Achilles’ Heel. Loooooove,” really?
The other day I was browsing books online (something I spend an embarrassing amount of my time on) when I discovered such curiosities as these. Curious about this publishing house I’d never heard of with titles that were either a) identical to those of movies, comics, music videos, etc., or b) nearly nonsensical chains of free association, I became suspicious about this imprint called Alphascript Publishing.
When I saw that Scott Kaufman and Jeremy Osner had participated in a meme to post the first thing you ever ordered from Amazon, I thought that sounded like fun and that I would join in.
When I learned that the first thing I ever bought from Amazon was Speakerboxxx/The Love Below, I thought that was pretty fitting.
When I realized that this meant I would have two posts in six months, and that they would both be about a band with no significant releases since my first Amazon purchase seven years ago, I felt a little silly.
If you aren’t already, I highly suggest following Dave Segal’s I Love Rap. I’m so jealous of Dave’s ability to pull out these random cuts that pretty consistently knock.
I’m providing the music for a wedding reception this weekend, and the groom said something the other day like, “Todd, you have so much enjoyable music by people I’ve never heard of, it’s amazing.” My response was, “… Yeah, it’s not that impressive. Read Pitchfork for like 10 minutes a week and you’ll know more than I do about everything.” But, as someone who actually kinda-sorta tries to know a thing or two about rap, I feel comfortable saying that Dave’s knowledge is considerable.
Anyway, while I’m blogging, here’s one relatively obscure track* I can play for you. OutKast & Slimm Calhoun’s “High Schoolin’”:
The words to this song have nothing to do with my high school experience, but from the opening bar I’m immediately back in 1999. Because I lived at least half an hour from anything worth doing and didn’t drive, my high school experience was to some extent defined by time spent in passenger seats, and by the music we played in the car. I had this song on a mixtape that I played constantly in Allison’s beat up Chevy Nova. Fortunately, I did not develop the same lasting attachment to the Rage Against the Machine on the same tape.
*It’s possible that this is a throw-away track from a weak soundtrack, and I’m just biased because my love for pre-Stankonia, “two kids from Georgia” OutKast knows no bounds. Let me know in the comments if so.
Briefly, a story. Ed Whelan, who apparently worked in the Bush administration Office of Legal Counsel, has been saying dumb things about Sonia Sotomayor. Eugene Volokh dismantled some of these dumb things, and publius from Obsidian Wings linked to the dismantling. Whelan took offense at this, and responded by publishing publius’s real name. Publius posted about why this is an odious thing to do.
This last post generated this awesome bit of wingnuttery:
An “unbelievable dick” is what I would call someone who takes pot shots using a pseudonym. You folks are like the fat guy who thinks he’s tough anonymously posting threats only to be found out and confronted in a Blockbuster parking lot, suddenly shrinking like a violet. [...]
Posted by: BigYap | June 07, 2009 at 12:44 AM
If I were awesome enough to be Scott Kaufman, and if this blog were awesome enough to be Edge of the American West, this would be filed under “SEK is shocked SHOCKED! to find that there is rightwing lunacy on the internet.” Unfortunately, none of that is true, so it’s just an isolated case study in stupid.
Sometime in January I found this website called Sex in Christ, which describes how to get freaky without making Jesus sad. It’s full of great advice, such as
Are you saving yourself for your wedding night? The Devil wants you to fail, that’s why he puts stumbling blocks in your way. But God wants you to succeed, and that’s why he has given us an alternative to intercourse before marriage: anal sex. Through anal sex, you can satisfy your body’s needs, while you avoid the risk of unwanted pregnancy and still keep yourself pure for marriage.
and
His sin was pulling out (coitus interruptus) and ejaculating on the ground rather than into the woman. He did so in order to avoid impregnating her. However, he could have easily avoided God’s wrath (and the penalty of death), by simply having the woman fellate him and then swallow his semen.
I never posted this because I couldn’t decide whether or not it was a parody. How could anyone seriously say, “Given the powerful symbolism of the fist, it is no surprise that couples who have partaken in the practice of fisting have described it as being a profoundly spiritual experience.” Surely they’re just making fun of the saddlebackers, right?
But then I got an email from the American Family Association trying to sell me a DVD, and I lost all faith in my ability to decide questions like “How could anyone seriously say X?” So I figured I may as well bring it to you, and let you decide what’s serious and what isn’t.
The DVD is called It’s Not Gay, and it is described thusly (emphasis added):
It’s Not Gay presents a story that few have heard, allowing former homosexuals the opportunity to tell their own story in their own words. Along with medical and mental health experts, these individuals express a clear warning that the sanitized version of homosexuality being presented to students is not the whole truth.
Uncompromising, yet compassionate, It’s Not Gay is a fair and balanced approach to this challenging subject.
This video has been shown in thousands of churches. Only 28 minutes in length, it makes a perfect fit to use in a Sunday School class, women’s or men’s group or youth group, etc.
Really? Fair and balanced? That’s what you’re going to go with? And you’re not, like, trying to win a contest for least-self-aware advertisement ever? My mind is blown.
Obviously there have been a lot of changes during the first week of the Obama presidency, but here’s one that you might have noticed. WhiteHouse.gov has started to turn into a user-friendly website with some interesting content. Blog posts instead of press releases! It’s mad, I tell you.
Here’s my favorite bit so far:
For incoming White House staff, the past few days have been a singularly thrilling — and learning — experience. Wide-eyed staffers roam the halls of the Eisenhower Executive Office Building with thick stacks of HR paperwork in hand, new phone numbers are being memorized — and the line for coffee and club sandwiches is starting to grow as word spreads about the White House Mess. It’s safe to say that working at the White House isn’t something anyone can prepare for, but the career staff continue to work tirelessly to make the first few days as smooth as possible.
How adorable is the mental image of a staffer scuttling about with an arm full of poorly-sorted paper, oggling the hallways? I’m sure I’m being played a little bit here, and the incoming staff are more savvy than awestruck. But I like the idea that the office, indeed the very building, might mean something to these people. Even if they aren’t really agog.
While trying to find a place to have dinner tomorrow night, I discovered an awesome blog. The Eaten Path features gorgeous food-photography, thoughtful, well-written reviews, a blog template that includes a Piggly Wiggly, and a whole series on a road trip designed around eating barbecue at fifteen restaurants between Washington, DC and Austin, TC. The guy has even been to Family Pie Shop. What more could you possibly hope to find in a blog?
Tomorrow is my birthday, and we’ll be driving up to Seal Beach to dine at Beachwood BBQ, in large part due to this review (and this beer menu). We would normally do something fancier, but so many of our attempts to have a nice meal in Orange County have met with disappointment due to relatively average food being sold at exceptional prices. I’m stoked, because I don’t believe another Family Pie Shop patron would lead me astray.
For reasons that are no longer apparent to me, I was looking up the Tales from the Crypt show that ran on HBO in the 90s. I’m hoping that some of you, like myself, have fond memories of watching this show, more notable for twist endings than being particularly scary (although I’ll confess that I remember an episode or two that created a sense of creepiness that lingers to this day). As always, Wikipedia is the best resource for everything, and their coverage of the show comes complete with an episode list that conveys better than anything just how cool the show was. Anyone remember the episode where the old millionaire is buying (piecemeal) the body of a young stud? Did you realize that Ahnold directed it? Remember that one where the criminal is handcuffed to the dead body of a state trooper in the middle of the desert? Did you know, back then, that Kyle MachLachlan played the criminal? Or that he later directed the episode where a husban suspects his wife of having an affair with a priest? (The husband is Adam West, by the way.) Another gem that I only discovered when looking up the show is an episode where Ed Begley, Jr., plays a travelling salesman struggling to escape alive from a hillbilly family played by Tim Curry (yes, all three family members are Tim Curry). You can watch it online here (I’d embed the video but it’s in four parts, so you’d need to click through anyway). It’s not terribly scary, but it is mildly disturbing, somewhat amusing, and actually a great performance by Curry on all three counts – just about everything that made the show worth watching when I was young.
Two bits of awesome from the internet, either of which you may already have seen. The first is really old; in fact, I’m upset that no one told me earlier that there’s a music video featuring the entire male cast of The Karate Kid. (Except, of course, for Pat “Mr. Miagi” Morita; his role is filled in admirably by Mr. Belding.) The song is pretty mediocre, but the conceit is perfect.
Second, I absolutely demand that you go and watch Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog. It is (so far) thirty minutes of pure awesome. Awesome put together by Joss Whedon during the writers’ strike, and staring Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Fillion. In Whedon’s words:
Frustrated with the lack of movement on that front, I finally decided to do something very ambitious, very exciting, very mid-life-crisisy. Aided only by everyone I had worked with, was related to or had ever met, I single-handedly created this unique little epic. A supervillain musical, of which, as we all know, there are far too few.
Go there, and don’t come back until you’ve gotten to the end of Act II and you know what the hammer is. It’s only available until Sunday, so go quickly.
